Page 1 of 1

Ben's personality exposed by a penalty kick

Posted: Thu Jul 01, 2010 7:25 pm
by Flossie
I think the underlying causes of Ben's many character flaws were exposed by his ….. attempts at penalty taking.

As he took the penalty his arms involuntarily reached for the sky just as a school girl’s might attempting the same thing, his upper body was vertical and as stiff as a board, his leg could barely articulate a pathetic swipe at the ball, his foot barely contacted the ball and the contact point was utterly random, as was the trajectory of the ball. The novel challenge to body and brain was well beyond the capabilities of either. Neurons in his brain which had never fired before were suddenly exercised and then delivered desperate and speculative instructions to muscles which were shocked by their arrival; the end result was a truly embarrassing mess of incoherent limb movement.

In that one act he demonstrated that he is a social outcast: he has never played with a ball; he has never been part of a team sport of any sort; he has probably never engaged in physical competition or coordination with other people in a physical task; and he is unaware of the behaviour of the effects of forces on objects and utterly unaware of how to use his body to apply them; he is detached from much of the real world.

One can speculate what is cause and effect: was he a social outcast first and thereby denied opportunities to engage in team activities and sports, or did his physical ineptitude lead him to being a social outcast?

I personally think the social outcast state predated the physical ineptitude and the latter is simply a symptom of the former.

The end result of his formative years is an effeminate, social deluded, immature, limp, self-indulgent, socially inept character who seems to think that because he feels disconnected from groups of others, that he must be part of some elite with special rights and powers which include being able to take things from the group without consideration of the needs of members of the group.

No doubt his belief that society should be governed by a powerful elite, of which he should be a member, with authoritarian powers that are immune to the wishes of the masses, reflects an underlying worry he must have that society as currently formed will leave him isolated from power in society in the same way he is isolated in social groups.

He is annoyed and frustrated by his isolation and lack of influence and so he attempts to change his situation with ingratiation with and manipulation of others, which all end in abject failure. Were it not for the odious Mario he would be even more isolated and powerless than he already is.

If only he had bothered to learn how to kick a ball to overcome his social ineptitude at an early age he may have turned out so differently.

Posted: Fri Jul 02, 2010 12:35 am
by Triggers
I have written about three fairly long-winded responses to this - may I say - excellently written and entertaining post :D In summary, I went into how I disagree with your steadfast correlation between a person's inability to kick a ball and their resultant social ineptitude and I mentioned that your train had obviously just pulled into Generalisation Central again :p However, I completely agree with this part,

"The end result of his formative years is an effeminate, social deluded, immature, limp, self-indulgent, socially inept character who seems to think that because he feels disconnected from groups of others, that he must be part of some elite with special rights and powers"

I wonder if Ben truly does feel he is "better" than other people, or just different. I'll bet he has been judged overly quickly by people in the past. I haven't seen any of the housemates really,really try to see past his accent - or their own quickly arrived at judgements of who he is. I think the disconnection that Ben feels is probably a by-product of this, although he does certainly have a social awkwardness. But the problem for him is he so wants to feel a sense of "belonging" He seeks comfort by stroking and hugging housemates which is at odds with the fact that none of them have really made an emotional connection with him. He carries on the ingratiating behaviour regardless, when it would probably be best if he relaxed and celebrated his individuality - even his pompousness.
Alas, I think Ben has tried to conform and adapt to the undulating social "sea" within the house, and has found himself slightly adrift. As in his normal life probably.
God, this IS long-winded now! I'll just say that however correct you were in highlighting Ben's failings - I still like him. We are about as distant in lifestyles and class and upbringing as two people could be - but I actually believe I would like him, were I in the house. If nothing else I feel quite protective of him, 'cos he's a bit of a numpty, a lost boy trying to be tough - but I think he has a decent, good heart. Phew! :o


I'll read your post again Flossie - it really is very funny in parts! 8-D

Posted: Fri Jul 02, 2010 9:13 am
by Flossie
And we have the clip here

Image

Posted: Fri Jul 02, 2010 10:08 am
by Triggers
He's a big girl's blouse - bless! :D

Posted: Fri Jul 02, 2010 11:16 am
by Flossie
In Ben's entry video he made various assertions about his aloof social status, so I suspect that attitude invites the isolation that he suffers. It is possible this is a defence mechanism that he has developed over the years to account for the isolation imposed on him by social groups and is actually an effect rather than a cause, but I suspect not. I suspect his attitude is the cause of his isolation and he is all rather confused by the effect his attitude has on others.

I think people don't make an effort to get know people if they think they are aloof and disdainful and have other unattractive character traits.

He does seem desperate for acceptance and social support, such as the cuddling, which is counter to the messages he delivered in his audition video where he was disdainful of others and seemingly denied any need for social approval or acceptance.

I think his lack of social acceptance and resultant powerlessness in social situations tempts him to seek social influence through attempts at ingratiating and manipulative behaviour, all unsuccessful.

Posted: Fri Jul 02, 2010 11:56 am
by Triggers
I haven't seen any of the housemates' entry videos, but aren't they, by nature, a very extreme and exaggerated portrayal of their character traits? I think they are sensationalist pieces designed to illustrate the grotesque, elicit reactions from viewers and bring about snap judgements and knee-jerk reactions - which is exactly why some of them got "boos" on their way IN to the house!

"It is possible this is a defence mechanism that he has developed over the years to account for the isolation imposed on him by social groups and is actually an effect rather than a cause"

I do wonder about this myself, actually clap: I think Ben probably wonders too. He is deluding himself by denying "any need for social approval or acceptance". I think he craves it, and is in constant bewilderment as to why he doesn't have it. And I think it is precisely this which is the impetus for his ingratiating behaviour. It is a means of finding acceptance and approval moreso than "social influence"

I think Ben is a man who doesn't know himself very well at all. His social and personal confusion is borne of a discrepancy in how he feels he should be perceived, and how he is perceived. And I'm sure lots of people have never really given him the time.

Posted: Sat Jul 03, 2010 2:12 pm
by Flossie
I agree the audition videos are caricatures of the housemates, but the comments Ben made were entirely consistent with his subsequent behaviour.

As for Ben's needs for social approval, I do think he has been denied this in earlier life and, as you say, he has now deluded himself he doesn't need it, when in fact he seems to need it more than most and despite his preparedness to battle with the Tree of Temptation, he does seem to be of a delicate constitution and his delusions about his needs reflect this.

He did perform quite well in his stand up thing, and perhaps there are some things he can do, dealing with remote, large anonymous crowds in one off situations may be one, while still being appalling at the social interactions required in a small group in which all the members become familiar with one another and thereby critical of one another.

He certainly believes he is of a high social status and deserving of it, alas this is an opinion not shared by those familiar with him, except for the little creep Mario.

Posted: Sat Jul 03, 2010 6:14 pm
by Triggers
Every time I watch that clip, I laugh! I wonder if rugby is more his type of sport :D

Posted: Sun Jul 04, 2010 12:38 am
by Flossie
He is even less a rugby player than he is a football player.

Posted: Tue Jul 06, 2010 6:38 pm
by Triggers
Flossie wrote:He is even less a rugby player than he is a football player.

I was typing with my tongue firmly in my cheek :D

Posted: Tue Jul 06, 2010 11:14 pm
by Flossie
:spank: :spank: :spank: :spank: :spank: :spank: :spank: